This is a never-ending question whenever I introduce my pen name.
Friends (and some non-friends) recognize this name in vandalisms in my High School; in some online and LAN games I play; in social media sites like Facebook, Friendster, Myspace, and Multiply; even in blogsites like Blogger, Thoughts, and Tumbler; and now, I use this name in my writings.
Okay. I am Bernard.
People usually call me by my nickname "Bern".
It has been my nickname since I was little. Hardly can I remember, but I was first called that way maybe when I was around 8 years of age.
During schooldays, I had a classmate named Leonard, and whenever the gang is calling "nard", the two of us would respond to that call. They decided that I should be called "bern" and my friend "nard".
Since that day up to my high school, my nickname became Bern. Well there was this event during the Christmas season that we should make a codename for ourselves that will be used for the typical monito-monita (exchanging of gifts). I didn't know what to use so I decided to try a little research. It wasn't successful because it didn't happen. I'm lazy. Around the house, I saw a random scribble in a trash paper that spelled out "F-L-A-M-E". That fascinated me.
Bern sounds like Burn. Burn is related to fire, or FLAME.
I took it from then on. Closer friends knew me as flame. At times, they even call me that. It didn't bother me anyway since I think it was cool. I was young then.
The name Flame became FLAME028.
Now, why the number 28?
My favorite number that time is 34. Thirty-four, because my name Bernard has three letters on the first syllable and four at the latter.
That's BER=3 and NARD=4 so 34.
The number 34 is not on the calendar, so I dropped it.
My next favorite number is 1. One, because I wanted to be number 1. I never wished to be a mediocre.
So how number 1 became 28?
Simple. Actually, no. I got the digits 28 from numerology (just google it if you haven't heard of it). I selected numbers that if I add, it would yield 1 as result. Not possible. I got to get a larger number. 10. Is 10 good enough? I don't know. Again, I selected numbers that if I add, it would yield 10 as result. I got 28, 37, and 19. I just chose 28 because my birthdate falls on the 28th of the month.
That's 28 2 + 8 = 10, 1 + 0 = 1.
My favorite number 1 is still attached to my pen name, only, it is a bit unseen.
Now, what's with the name?
I've been using this name for quite a while now. I decided to discard it. Anyways, I'm not getting any younger to continue using such a fancy name.
F is the freaking 6th letter of the alphabet!
F028 now equates 6.28.
June 28 is my birthday. Creepy. Am I using a pen name that has really something to do with me?
All my life, I've been struggling between the battle of worldly things and the spiritual. I hate it when people are associating the idea of success to materialistic things. They worry so much about money and stuff. I hate it. I want to do something about it. I've always been doing something about it.
That reminds me of a particular bible verse. It is something about the lilies or flowers and still grows. If these flowers do nothing but still grow because of God's grace, what more for us, humans, whom He loves the most?
I looked for that particular story in the bible and found this:
"And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. -Matthew 6:28 NIV"
That's Matthew 6:28.
Chapter 6 verse 28.
Flame is bern.
And Bern, Yep, that's me.
I guess accidents really happen, and everything happens for a reason. For a purpose. For His purpose. The flame shall continue burning for this purpose. His will be done.